Isn’t it something how visual we are as people when formulating opinions: opinions about others and about ourselves? I was talking with a friend & he mentioned how we (as individuals) “are always comparing our insides to other people’s outsides.” I didn’t catch what he was talking about & asked him to explain. Well, we (individuals) know our own flaws, weaknesses, and shortcomings, and our self-imposed/perceived flaws, and we walk around conscious of them, and compare them to what we see on the exterior of others.
For example, I have a 1991 Toyota pickup truck that I just got painted and a needs-to-be-painted 1995 Mazda 626, but when I’m driving around, all these other people have newer vehicles, and some have very expensive vehicles. Sometimes I’m thinking to myself, “won’t I be better if I get a newer vehicle & look well-put-together like all of these other people.” They look like they are doing everything right when you see them in their fresh cars compared to me in my old vehicles. Sometimes I do feel like I am not on the same playing field when looking at what others have accumulated, and I have to just remember that the person is more important than the thing…Steve.
But feeling inadequate isn’t limited to the observation of material possessions. We formulate opinions when we observe other’s attractiveness. I have a friend who is slim and as pretty as any person could be, but she views herself as anything but attractive. Anyone looking at her would think, “she has nothing to worry about, slim…cute, I wish I had her genes.” But she was chubby growing up and always felt unattractive as a kid, and at some point she decided to do something about it. So as an adult, she works compulsively on the attempt to look perfect and flawless on the outside to cover up how she still feels flawed on the inside.
We all have some degree of concern to how others perceive us, because if not, I wouldn’t have gotten my truck painted and left it in the same physical state and just said, “who cares how it looks.” How we feel about ourselves on the inside determines everything that we do on the outside: behavior, clothing, hairstyles, vehicles, houses, etc etc.
We all can continue to think better of ourselves in one way or another.
Steve